Summer 2006.
I remember sitting on the Emirates plane hovering over the island where I was supposed to spend the next few years getting myself a decent education.
And I remember crying. Crying my heart out. Asking Him if I truly deserved being here. Relishing the feeling that you get when your wildest of dreams come true. And thanking Him for letting me chase that one thing I always longed for.
Four years later, nothing has changed. I still find it difficult sometimes to believe that I have made my journey in one piece; I didn't think I could. I didn't think I would.
London taught me a lot of things; but most importantly, it taught me that I could do anything I wanted to, if I truly wanted to do it. In this city, nobody grows up dreaming. They grow up planning. Planning to achieve. Planning to get it. Get it all.
It's tough out here. It's miserable. It's cold. And usually, you are alone.
My years at University, have been a mess, really. After all this, I still don't think I know how to talk to a girl so she doesn't write me off as an arrogant, stuck-up fool. I probably don't even know how to talk to a professional to land myself a decent job.
I get scared. I still cry. I get dumbfounded at all the wrong times. I yell...a lot.
Nevertheless, despite these shortcomings there were a few other things that I did manage to learn over the course of these years...
I learnt to lead. Especially when no body had a bloody clue. I learnt to make friends. I learnt to apologise, to say I was wrong. I learnt to accept that I am not perfect. I learnt to compromise, albeit fairly marginally. I learnt to fend for myself.
And, I learnt a lot about Finance.
Oh, and there is one other thing, too.
I learnt to believe. Especially in my own self.
The belief that tends to waver in the face of adversary far superior to you in age, knowledge and experience. I wouldn't say I was afraid of competing, because quite frankly, I didn't even try an oust of the better competitor.
I learnt my lesson the day I actually did.
It was epiphany, all over again.
Is what I know today enough to get me through the world? I don't know...
And, here I sit today, squandering the last few days of my student-hood, with a complete lack of interest in the pile of work that needs to be submitted over the next few days...
I understand it is over. I will never get to visit this timeline again.
But, I also remember the words from our Student Union's President's address to the graduates, last year, that...
"What we have been through so far, collates to just several chapters in a book - some short and some long.And, what we will step into, now, is the next volume...This goes to prove that your life hasn't finished.In fact, it's only just begun..."
"In this city, no body grows up dreaming. They grow up planning."
ReplyDeleteI like that.
The rest of it, I loved it.
i cant help but resound on the girl part...hehehe
ReplyDeletealso i share your difficulty in believing that you are here, in london...
loved it XD